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Sex and diabetes are strange bedfellows and low libido is an unwelcome guest that can make things worse. But with understanding you can increase desire and enjoy a robust sex life. I know first hand because my husband is Type II diabetic.

Before he was diagnosed we both struggled through a year of not understanding what was happening with our sex life.

To me, he didn’t seem as interested in sex because he wasn’t initiating as much and would lose his erections more often than not, leaving me feeling undesired and hurt.

For him, he struggled with the fact that his body seemed to be betraying him. But more than that he struggled with feeling like he was disappointing me.

All of this affected our relationship in a negative way. I nagged him to go to the doctor. He resisted. He assured me he desired me. His low libido didn’t reflect his words.

Fast forward to the diagnosis and when things got worse for us.

He went through a myriad of emotions in the months following finding out he had diabetes. Anger, sadness, fear, feelings that he was somehow broken, and self-confidence that started to tank. He withdrew even more.

I hit the books. I was scared about what diabetes would mean to his health. I was on a mission to find out everything I could. I did the research and even though I had good intentions I didn’t help matters because I bombarded him with information. It’s no wonder he withdrew.

There’s nothing sexy about having diabetes but you can still have a great sex life. Click To Tweet

Here’s part of what having sex as a diabetic really looks like: None of it is sexy but knowing and paying attention to these things can increase libido and help you enjoy a great sex life.

  • See a trusted physician for a comprehensive physical.
  • Check blood sugar levels before and after sex until you know how your body reacts to sexual activity. Based on this you’ll know the time of day that’s best for sex and if you need a snack before hand.
  • Clean your relationship house. Stress can increase glucose levels so seek out help to resolve any emotional intimacy problems. This is the work I do.
  • Don’t avoid sex. Aerobic activity is important for diabetics. It increases the number of insulin receptors in your cells that can help your medication work better.
  • Enjoy pleasure. There are many ways to make love without having an erect penis. Focus on giving and receiving pleasure to each other’s entire bodies with your hands and mouths.
  • If you’re a woman with diabetes be aware of any pattern changes in your glucose around the time of your period and adjust meds, diet, exercise and sex accordingly.
  • As always be aware of your diet, especially your alcohol intake that raises your blood sugar levels which in turn can further damage the vascular system and impair erections in men and orgasms in both men and woman. High glucose also inhibits arousal leading to low libido and the avoidance of sex.

Be your authentic sexual self by managing your diabetes and having great sex.

Relationship problems and emotional baggage are toxic to your sex life. Resolving these and managing your diabetes can lead to sexual healing for your body, mind, heart and spirit. Your low libido can be a thing of the past.

Live a happy, sexy life!

Dr. Gayle Friend

For more on low libido and low desire click here to read a previous article.