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What Happened to all that Playfulness, Flirting & Those Butterflies in Your Tummy?

You know that ‘butterflies in your tummy’ playfulness and flirting of a new relationship? What happens to it? And more importantly how do you get it back in a long-term relationship?

Well in the beginning we’re energized by the excitement of ‘new’, and excitement feels good! When we’re happy, we’re playful and more flirtatious. We see the best in each other.

But as our relationship develops we start to see the reality of who our partner is. The real world starts to demand more of our attention. We have responsibilities. Maybe we create more responsibility by having kids. Life becomes routine.

When we get stuck in routines, we forget to be playful and flirt. But we need this. Our relationships need this just like we need oxygen.

gayle-friend-toothpasteNot long ago my husband and I were getting ready to go out. I was just out of the shower and brushing my teeth. Being the multi-tasker I am I asked him what the weather forecast was with a mouth full of foaming toothpaste.

My question was barely audible and the face my husband made as he teased me made me laugh hysterically. I couldn’t stop. There was toothpaste foam dripping down my chin and all over my chest. The photo doesn’t show the half of it.

We were both belly laughing because I looked like the final scene of a porn film with cum all over my face. I had to take a selfie.

It so easily could have gone in another direction. It could have ended in annoyance, misunderstanding and hurt feelings. If we’re stressed we’re not as open to those moments of fun.

But that day the whole thing was playfulness that led to a sex joke, flirting and then playful sex.

Playfulness and flirting are important to intimacy. Click To Tweet

If we’re going to let our hair down with anyone, shouldn’t it be our partner, our lover? Don’t let the opportunity for playfulness pass you by – stay open to it. When you do, your mood shifts instantly.

Better yet, don’t wait for the ‘right’ opportunity to be playful or flirt. Make it a daily commitment. Tell a joke. Liberate yourself and your partner from routine by flirting. Send a sexy text. Be silly. Use your imagination. Get your playful flirtatious self back by practicing until it’s natural again. I promise, you’ll have a whole lot more fun.


Dr. Gayle Friend

p.s. Besides flirting and being playful there are 15 secrets to increase intimacy, deepen love and have great sex. Learn what they are in my FREE video series. Sign up now!